Actual Sobriety is very helpful to a drunk's stability...

 I did not manage to remain sober back in 2015, sadly. So, another 5 years passed until I did. That date is August 30, 2020 - early pandemic.

Not only did I manage alcohol, but, also cigarettes! Woop woop...pretty cool, huh? Well, after 50 years of smoking on and off, seemed like a good idea - needless to say, I tried many times before either was accomplished. I thank AA meetings in the beginning and then, Recovery Dharma online for several years which was much more helpful to me. I didn't have to cringe and battle my feelings about Christianity anymore - major bonus!!!

So, currently, I'm a bit adrift on sobriety support. I'm not managing regular or even infrequent attendance at KTC, nor the one in Athens. Long story but, suffice to say, my ADHD plays a major role. In fact, my ADHD has played a major role in my life for years and years, despite no diagnosis. I even explored autism spectrum or asperger's syndrome. Although, my evaluation did not come up positive, I'm not convinced she got it right. I think women continue to be misunderstood and under researched in this area, as in so many others. But, oh well, no biggie, I know me and my history and remain fairly confident I am on the spectrum. Although gifted with good intelligence, I see many points in my past when my learning disabilities (autism spectrum and adhd) played a major role.

OK, that previous paragraph is quite the stream-o-consciousness, eh? Back to the introduction of the paragraph, I'm feeling a need for more support these days but, still looking to fulfill that need. That is, when I remember, which is rarely right now. I've been off stimulants now for over a month. My new doc just refilled them for me. I am hoping to soon see an amazing improvement in being able to do the things I want to do. fingers crossed...

I'm having a hell of a time doing a class that i love online in tapestry weaving. I'm having so much trouble staying with it and staying on the learning path, it's really disturbing for me!

In fact, I'm hopeful that getting out here regularly, instead of every couple of years may aid me in that pursuit. 

Self-awareness, an aspect of life most intelligent individuals take for granted, alludes me entirely. And, if I could commit to coming here and writing, my hope is to make it a part of my life.

I continue to pursue information on my ADHD. I'm currently reading Scattered by Gabor Mate - great Canadian doc, who also has it and has very helpful things to say about it. 

Newest Life beginning! June 26, 2015!

OK, so, another couple of years have passed! and, I'm working on yet, another new me! This one doesn't consume alcohol at all and the clearing of the brain works wonders! So, let's try this again with a clearer head...amazing!

So, June 26, 2015 is a date to remember for me for two huge reasons!!! Number one! My wife and I are now legally married in the whole of the United States of America! And, No. 2! That date marks the beginning of my sobriety! How convenient! Two extremely important dates rolled into one! Love it!

So, let's see how I do, working on becoming a regular AA attendee, that's hard when you're, presumably, a Buddhist...still working that out...

But, I am finding a clarity that has been 40 years awaiting me! That's pretty cool when you're 64! I'm so lucky! Thank you Universe!

So, I got here today via a link to a knitting technique...I need to go master it now, rather than type away, so I can make someone very special a very special little elephant...

love! mj

OK, what's a couple of year interval among friends? Funny how my issues have not changed all that much in the interim, sorry to report! But, despite that, I march on. I am now, at least, semi-officially retired, as in receiving Social Security.

Just returned from a fabulous vacation in Belize, specifically, Caye Caulker, Belize and will try to find a photo to share. My main goal presently is to organize my days, now that I am retired. Organizing anything is a real challenge for me, though. That is not new from the stroke, but it has been exacerbated, I believe is the right term; in other words, it's worse!


So, my current schedule plan is this:

1. awake and have some coffee
2. take Candigone pills
3. walk Marni
4. do computer work (ha! play on Facebook!)
5. work on fiber project
6. eat light lunch
7. work on fiber project
8. take Candigone pills one hour prior to dinner
9. walk Marni
10. enjoy evening with Nina

Wow, it was strange reading those old posts...life is quite a bit better, though, the typing remains a challenge on this laptop, I'm doing much better. As for completing projects...well staying focused remains my greatest challenge. Still working to resolve that and to organize and to complete projects. Wonderful trip out west just completed, though! Camping near Taos - rain dampened that a bit. Wonderful couple of days in Cimmaron, NM.

Great being back home in familiar surroundings but, really love NM!!! Might have to move there one day...

wonderful dinner with Gordon and Xenia friends last night in Beavercreek. Unfortunately, may have been coming down with something and was ill the whole way home...not fun.

Today I get to play with yarn and take it easy. Plan to watch a video about Walmart and all the damage it does to communities, so become more enlightened about "box stores" and how bad they are for all of us. I also have the latest Dan Brown _The Lost Symbol_ to listen to, if I can just find my missing-in-action-ipod...

Things going missing is my greatest issue these days...

Called "clear the clutter" organizer and am scheduled for a 10am appointment to assess my issues with "stuff" on Friday...need to also continue organizing my stuff, best I can...

Let's hope 2010 is a far more positive year than 2009 was! I wish that for everyone!

OK too many projects running through my brain currently...typical pre-xmas dilemma for me. Oh well practicing typing here mostly. So, thinking about lace scarves for my daughters yes, two now that Ian is hitched! And a pair of lacy gloves for Nina! Better go get started now!!!